People are funny. Funny is a much nicer word than the word most of us are thinking that work in close proximity to a team of people. Or maybe its just me that was thinking it. Somehow I was blessed with the ability to say things everyone is thinking, but most won't dare to utter. Which gets me in trouble 99.9% of the time. I know what you're thinking, but trust me I am working on it. It isn't exactly the most welcoming trait for a pastor's wife to wear. Somehow I have taken the saying "the truth shall set you free" to a whole notha level. BUTTT...thats a sermon for another day.
If you are the pastor's wife who doesn't consider yourself a partner in ministry with your husband, tune me out. This is for all my ladies who dive in head first with the pastor and walk alongside him in his calling. If thats you, you probably spend your time with lots of people, lots of personalities, and lots of time practicing grace and humility. Boy, was the last two a horse-pill to swallow. Unfortunately, lately I haven't been practicing the latter. Can I confess that to you? I am quick to give my opinion, quick to protect my husband (pastor) and quick to help people recognize what isn't exactly in line. BUT, God has been nudging me ever so slightly to bite my tongue more and more, about 92% of the time.
My husband, he has such long enduring, long suffering, extended grace, humility, and love for people. I MEAN, sometimes I just want to shake him and yell "WAKE UP!!" But, thats what makes him the perfect candidate to pastor people. He just got a pastor's wife God is still working on, working A LOT on! A couple years back when we were in rest from full-time ministry, I prayed God would teach me how to love people well. As hard and rewarding as that season was, I felt I was finally getting it. Understanding what that looked like to truly love people. Then, we went back into ministry and I feel like I am having to learn all over again. People are rough and tough. They all have their opinions, ideas, values, personalities, backgrounds, and more. Its a tough crowd. And Jesus loves and adores them all, A LOT more than I do. Like, He really loves them, and thinks their great, and awesome, and precious, and perfect.
I know I am most likely just as hard to deal with. I have my imperfections, too many to count. I love to tickle my husband who hates it. I am a little to much of a neat freak. I speak out loud before I think. I don't communicate very well, unless I am typing. Yes, text me don't call me. I am strong and bull-headed. My speaking voice is just average. I only wish I had that sweet speaking pastor’s wife voice. Like, this is something I pray for. God can do anything, right? He can take my voice a little higher and give it a sweet sound.
The more agitated, and annoyed I get with others. The more I am reminded how imperfect I am as well. I am just a girl on a learning journey to love myself well, give myself grace, and extend even more love and grace to others. The enemy has a sneaky way of breeding disunity towards insecurities and self hatred, and through nit-picking everyone else’s flaws and imperfections. Rather than seeing what is good. I so often as a pastor’s wife have blurred vision towards everything good in my life. When God wants me to see what He sees through His eyes. I choose more often than not to play God and try to expose to light everything I see. Rather than choose to see what God says is good.
After this read, you are thinking gee whizz how did she get this gig? Well, that’s a question I am still trying to figure out myself. But if I were to guess, maybe you are just a little bit like me and are blessed beyond measure to call yourself pastor’s wife. And just maybe, you realize you aren't alone. We are all imperfect people, God says are perfect no matter what our title is!
xo a girl who sleeps with the pastor