We all got our stuff don't we. We have stories of where we have come, what we have went through, and what we are going through in our personal lives, and in our ministry ones. Difficult seasons that bear much weight. Some of us have more difficult ones than others of us. But to each of us, our own circumstances can be huge walls and barriers to what we desire them to be.
There was a season in ministry, where it seemed like one blow after another was coming. Finances were lacking, we didn't have a place to live, seemed as no one was buying into the vision of the church anymore, we felt alone, my pregnancy had some abnormalities, I broke one bone after another, and our marriage seemed to be unraveling in the mad chaos of it all.
In that season, I relied on the one thing I knew to stand firm and true, and that was the name of Jesus. I learned to be vulnerable and not hold it together, for the sake of looking perfect. But to be transparent about the way I felt to people. This was freeing, and lifted the burden I carried. But it wasn't always this way. In past seasons, I got really good at holding things together and masking it with a facade.
However, holding things together and hiding the truth can hinder healing. As pastors' wives sometimes we get stuck in the role we are in and forget we can mess up, have difficult seasons, and struggle too. We start believing the lie the devil so desires us to believe, and before we know it we are dying in the weight of the burdens we carry all alone. However, when you're stripped of everything and it all starts falling apart, is when your heart reveals what it's beating for.
As pastors' wives we must lead with integrity. We must be honest without the woe is me mentality, but with a boldness of laying our burdens at the feet of Jesus and being willing to allow others to carry some with us. We are mere humans, and we will have hard seasons. God never promised an easy road ahead. But what He did say was, to take heart for I have overcome it.
We are already more conquerors. God has already won. The seasons will come that are difficult, and heavy on your spirit. Start looking at it with a future mindset of being more than a conqueror. You have already won, and then some more. When you start looking at your circumstances and seasons with a winning mentality, the way Jesus sees them. Then the weight, burdens, and pain will become defeated in the present.
Jesus didn't come for you to get stuck in defeat. He came to win. He has already won this thing for you, so start believing it.
xo a girl who sleeps with the pastor