"I'm done!" Those magic words I would say whenever my husband and I got in a huge fight. No, not done with marriage, but done with church and ministry. Unfortunately, I am guilty as charged of using these two words as a tool to hurt. The enemy had whispered the lie in my ear that church was all that mattered to my husband and not our family. And afterwards, he handed me a sword of bitterness to swing on the days our marriage got rough.
How many of you have believed the lie of church being first over your family? It is a believable lie. Just look at what your husband does. He is a pastor called to full time ministry. Turning "off" is hard, and almost every conversation turns into a ministry related one. Every day is centered around the ministry you and your family is called to. Why shouldn't it be? If Jesus, and heaven is the end goal then my life and my husband's life should center around church and ministry, right? Wrong.
Our lives should center around Jesus. He should be the center focus and in the middle of everything we do. God called our family to pastor a church in this season. The devil knows how much work, joy, pain, and TIME it will take. Pastoring a church is one of the hardest and greatest jobs in the world. Like most families, pastoring is kind of like mothering. It is full-time, around the clock. Unfortunately, us pastors' wives forget that. Kind of like dads forget all we do as mothers for the family. Sometimes we can't comprehend just why our husband can't turn off, and want to listen to us after he has just listened to five other church members for the day.
Don't forget how much work and time it is pastoring a church. When you forget, the devil will be sure to whisper the lie in your ear. The church is not your husband's other wife. Church ministry is just a huge responsibility, and in this season it might need a little more time given to it. Give your husband a little more grace and mercy. I am for sure not giving the pastor an excuse. He still needs to give to his wife's needs, and he needs to love her like Christ loved the church.
Pastor's wife, those hard days. The days that you believe the lie. The days your needs aren't met. Jesus knows, and he is right there with you. Take it to Him. Don't use the words, "Im done." This will create bitterness, and breed animosity between you and your husband and the church. When the going gets rough, love anyways and pray fervently for your husband and the church God has called you to. You will have those days, ministry is hard. But, God knew you were the perfect one to pastor's wife His church. He equipped you with all you needed where He called you.
xo a girl who sleeps with the pastor