I am realizing more and more everyday of how much I used ministry as my binoculars to see Jesus. When you are in the battlefield, you are looking for the wounded, the hurting, and rely on Jesus to move in and through you to mend the broken and give the hope of Him to the lost. You see Jesus in everything, and live and breathe Him. We need Him in every aspect of our lives. As church planters we learn to live off of faith and trust in Him in with our finances, grocery shopping, sunday mornings, through out the week, and in every part of our lives.
Coming out of full time ministry for five years, to a temporary season of rest I am still trying to figure this whole thing out. I am learning to look for Jesus in new ways, and I never thought I would say this, but having ministry binoculars on blinded me from seeing Jesus in the little, everyday things. The binoculars were a crutch, and I never knew it. I am remembering, Jesus doesn't need ministry to move, or to show up. He can show up on a weed in a flower, or in a garden and a house you always wanted, or in the change of the wind. I am learning that God can move, show up, and be anywhere anytime without me living full time on the battlefield.
I guess what I am trying to say to you, and myself is this. When full-time ministry is gone, and the chaos that it brings has died down, what do you have left? Do you still see Jesus, and feel Him all around? Or did you get caught up in letting ministry define you, and by default relied on Jesus? Ladies, I don't want you or me to miss what God is trying to show us because we are only focused on what He is doing on the battlefield. I want us to remember He is everywhere, on the field, off the field, right here right now, and miles away too.
Pastors' wives start looking for Jesus without your ministry binoculars on. Start taking them off a whole lot more. Jesus wants us to see Him too. Our full time job in ministry is pointing people to Jesus, but we can't point people to Jesus unless we see and know where He is first. Look at Jesus more. Find Him in places you have never looked before. Look at Him more, everywhere. The church doesn't need a direction to go, but someone who walks the path daily, and can take them there.
xo a girl who sleeps with the pastor