When a woman is too nice to the pastor, and she isn't the pastor's wife. Is it just my husband, or is the oblivious radar a thing? My husband is friendly by nature. We have had to have a talk or two about his friendliness. While there is nothing wrong with having such a friendly pastoral spirit, it can be taken the wrong way. And boy, has it! It seems like some women attend church like it is a Justin Timberlake concert. Would the real single men please stand up, because yes the worship leader is married, so is the youth pastor, and believe it or not the pastor is too.
Year one and two of the church plant, we had more single college and young professional aged people coming than we did people married with families. This is the age where the "single and ready to mingle" syndrome happens. Unfortunately, one young woman had the bug that second year, and was consistently private messaging my husband her cell number in case "he ever needed to talk." Let's just say some conversations were had, and some boundaries were set. But with that, I am sure you ladies know, comes the title "crazy-jealous pastor's wife."
I never wanted to be viewed as the crazy-jealous pastor's wife, and I think there were times my husband thought it too. Any other wives out there know what I am saying? We ladies, we just know. It is like God has gifted us with a hound dog nose of discernment. It can be both a blessing and a curse. I want to know, but sometimes I just rather not. So when our nose gets a sniffing, and we go a warning. It can seem like we are just a crazy-jealous pastor's wife. Thankfully, more times than not, my warnings have later been exposed and I get the relief of hearing "you were right."
I will admit, my form in handling probably wasn't the best. Maybe some of you have better ways about "taking care of business" you can help me with. In my flesh, throwing a good punch would do the trick. Over the years, I let me husband know what I was feeling, and sensing. Then at all costs I avoided said woman. She actually probably needed me in her face more to be her accountability. And, I honestly should probably have prayed more for her. Someone that is prying on a married man needs a whole lot more prayer. You know what I am saying?
Pastors' wives, fortunately we have each other to relate to, laugh with, cry to, and occasionally throw punches for. Let's continually pray for each other and pray for protection from the enemy in our churches. We need to be praying more for the church and the women in it out causing trouble. If you haven't yet, set boundaries with the pastor. You may not think you need to, but boundaries are best set ahead of time to protect you when and if the time comes.
xo a girl who sleeps with the pastor